Best of 2015.

It's that time of the year again!

Walsh presents the Best of 2015 (in his opinion)

So here we go!

SONG OF THE YEAR 2015: Cheerleader by OMI


Yes, I'm going to get some head scratches here but when it's all said and done, I immensely enjoyed the song Cheerleader by OMI.  For the most part, it reminds me of Vampire Weekend, which is one of my favorite bands, so there's that.

MOVIE OF THE YEAR 2015: The Big Short


With a stacked cast starring Ryan Gosling, Steve Carell, Brad Pitt, and Christian Bale,  The Big Short told a story we all knew (The 2008 Housing Crisis) and put an enjoyable and entertaining spin on it courtesy of director Adam McKay (who directed Anchorman and The Other Guys among others). For those not strong with financial lingo should have no problem following along thanks to McKay's use of fourth wall breaking and celebrity cameos to explain to the viewers the financial jargon.  Runner up for Movie of the Year was Inside Out but The Big Short just made the deadline.

ALBUM OF THE YEAR 2015: Panic Stations by Motion City Soundtrack


I wasn't expecting to love this album as much as I did but something about Panic Stations spoke to me like no album this year had done before.  Justin Pierre's lyrics resonate with me through songs like TKO and Over It Now.  Panic Stations is a fantastic album through and through and was my favorite album of 2015.

TV SHOW OF THE YEAR 2015:  Review (TWO TIME WINNER)


Andy Daly as you are all aware is one of my favorite comedians and Review is comedy showcase. A very dark and sometimes disturbing take on being a reviewer, Andy Daly's Forrest MacNeil suffered even more through the second season which went to darker places it had been before.  I love dark comedy and even some of these episodes were hard to stomach but that's what made it so damn good. Review wins my show of the year for the second year running. I'm upset Comedy Central hasn't announced if it got renewed or not because the ending of Season 2 is a gut punch. Runner up was Rick and Morty which just had a few too many dud episodes to beat out Review's showcase.

GAME OF THE YEAR 2015:  JUST CAUSE 3


Pure Chaos.  That's how I describe my game of the year winner, JC3.  Just Cause 3 took its time to release not coming out till December 1st, 2015 but it was well worth the wait.  The sheer amount of destruction and chaos you can cause in this game is phenomenal.  The story could be better but the lush environments, gliding across the country of Medici with your wingsuit is something that cannot be matched.  I know a lot of people was probably expecting Fallout 4 here but Fallout 4 suffers from flaws.  However JC3 has its flaws as well with framerate dips and upgrades being locked behind shallow mini games but it's the most fun I had with my PS4 this year, so Just Cause 3 is my no doubt game of the year.

Happy New Year everyone.

Here's the another great year in 2016.

TRY HARDER.

"I'm trying my hardest, I really am"

"Try Harder"

Sometimes your best is never good enough.  Well for some people, some people will push you to your limits to be the best, others will want you to fail.  It's like Terence Fletcher in Whiplash, he pushed Andrew to the edge to be the best jazz percussion drummer and he worked his ass off to achieve that feat.  It's all about leadership and how you react to leadership.  Are they supportive?  Are they ruthless?  Are they a totalitarian?   Everyone's boss is different.  Anyways the message is clear.
"Try Harder".

This year in general...has been a rollercoaster.

I've dated more girls than I've dated my entire life which surprises me but makes me proud at the same time because I've finally gotten out of my comfort zone and I've adapted to the different type of girls you could possibly date. Some of them weren't good with communications, Some had miscommunications, in the end, I tried to be the best date I could be for them.  I learned some hard truths from dating and I guess I'll take what I've learned going forward with whoever else's eye I catch down the road.

I lost a good friendship because there were issues between him and I which I guess were not fixable, for the record, I didn't end the friendship, he ended it with me over the most ridiculous reasoning I've heard. We had been friends since High School but the road came to an end this Summer.  I don't think reconciliation is an options.  He's moved on and made his choice.  I can't change his opinion and that's really all there is to stay on the matter.

My passion for writing is bipolar,  I have days where I'd love to write and there are other days where I don't feel like it.  Yet I do some sort of writing  every day,  may it be a facebook post or a comment on a message board, I write.  I write text messages, I write opinions on sports articles, etc.  I love to have my voice be heard but I feel like at times I have no voice.

The year isn't over and I don't know what the rest of the year has in store for me but bring it on,

Maybe someday I'll make a career out of this but for now,  I'm an amateur writer for hire.

The Next Step.

So I'm happy to announce after many years, I have achieved one of my goals,  I finally have an Associate's Degree from Grand Rapids Community College.  It was a long, up and down journey but I'm glad it finally came to fruition.  The only thing I have left to wonder is where do we go from here?

What's the next step?

The answer is I truly do not know what the next step is.  I am happy that I have the associates degree but I don't know if it's going to get my foot in the door anywhere.  I'm just glad I finally have an Associate's Degree.  I could go for the Bachelor's degree but I'm honestly burned out on school, maybe that makes me a bad student, maybe it makes me an underachiever but I'm ready to throw in the towel with schooling.

My job is my crutch right now, it's what get me up every morning, some days are good, some days are bad but I would be nothing without it.  And yet, sometimes I just sit in my car and wish I would head in the opposite direction, the anywhere but here mentality, the wanting of something more out of life, just going on an adventure but I never go through with it because it's irresponsible but lord knows I've thought about it.  I think about it a lot actually.

I don't want to worry any of you but I've recently been thinking about existential crises, this thought was put on by finishing Season 2 of BoJack Horseman (which I highly recommend for fans of Will Arnett from Arrested Development and Alison Brie from Community, and Aaron Paul from Breaking Bad).  BoJack Horseman is an emotional draining/fulfilling show.  It makes you think about life in a different light and its kinda hit me hard lol.

It's not that I'm having an existential crisis but I'm just kinda going through the emotions as I do with life and its twists and turns.  I seek a deeper and better understanding of everything going around me and the desire to shift focus and or change my life for the better.  Sometimes I just sit in bed and think about everything going on in my head...I have the Associate's degree, what's the next step?

How can we better ourselves through our ever evolving world?

You know sometimes I think I'm pretty dense but other times, I feel like I'm pretty deep but it only comes out when I start moving my fingers across the keyboard.

I clearly have a passion for writing but only when I really put my heart and soul into it.  If I don't love it, I don't have the passion for it.

Coming back to this blog to vent every once in awhile is like a breath of fresh air.

I love it.

This week if I seem a little spaced out or out of it, I apologize, I'm just seeking a deeper connection and understanding of this life.

Anyways I love you all, have a great week and I'll see you around.

I'm not good at this.

You wasted life, why wouldn't you waste death? 

Hey everyone (whoever you are that read this...or actually enjoy reading this),  it's been a while since my last blog post.  I think that's part of the problem but I guess I'll just keep going.   I guess my issue is I really don't write unless I feel like venting or feel like pouring my heart out into a column.  I haven't written anything since my "break up" with Anna but at the same time, maybe I didn't feel like writing anything.  And maybe I don't feel like writing anything because...maybe I don't have the passion for writing I think I once had.

When I was a kid,  I dreamed of being a chef because of all the kooky conconctions I would make in the kitchen and I even showed interest in cooking when I was younger (there a pic of a young Walsh making chicken manicotti somewhere in this house) but it just like all faded away...and yet,  I still watch cooking shows religiously  ( I love Cutthroat Kitchen and MasterChef) and I guess it's just me living vicariously through the contestants wishing I would have achieved some sort of culinary zen but I didn't and won't.  And I know,  well just go to Culinary school and become the chef you want to be!  That ship has sailed my friends.

And then I was like I'm a pretty creative writer and I do enjoy writing so then I decided  I wanted to be a writer, at first I considered being an author, then it was a journalist, now I want to consider comedy writing,  but here's the spoiler alert...I'm not going to make any attempt of achieving my goals in life.  Now you're probably thinking  "Why is Walsh being so hard on himself?".  Well the truth of the matter is I know I won't achieve these goals because deep down inside  I'm just stuck on the same neutral path that I have put myself on so far.

I'll put it it out there that I am going back to school in May to finish my degree (Associates mind you) from GRCC but honestly what good is that degree going to do me?  Not much if I'm brutally honest, I think it's more of an issue of accomplishing the degree because I've gone too long to not successfully complete the program.  So now you're probably wondering what drew me to make this blog post. Well today at work, I got completely thrown under the bus and it kinda hurt my ego (and spirit).  Not going to go into detail but basically my superior was talking about me to a coworker behind my back and made me have a reality check where I stood on the employee hierarchy.

The truth is I probably hate my job but the pay is too good but I just feel like I can't get no respect no matter where I work,  All three of my jobs I've had I had issues with the management of the company, there's always a thorn in my side, it never changes,  it's getting annoying.  So I should get a new job right?  Wrong, because despite how much I don't like it...I'm perfectly fine where I am.

AND THAT MY FRIENDS IS MY CRUTCH.

I don't move,  I don't act,  I just stay put..constantly.

Basically I have no motivation/desires to move up (in any aspect of life).

Employement:  I have no desire in working for this company long term

Schooling:  It's taken me almost six years to get a two year degree

Housing:  Still living at home at 24..not looking like I'll move out anytime soon.

Relationships:  I have self sabotoged myself with every girl I've ever dated/had a date with.

I'm fine with the mundane?  What is this sorcery!

So if you've made it this far, I should give you a medal because this was basically just a giant rant on my views of how I view myself currently,  I'm my harshest critic and that's well apparent.  So the question I have to ask myself is do I ever really want to move forward in life or do I want to just ride the mundane wave for as many years as I see fit?

Did I write all of this because I got dissed at work?

Did I write all of this because I wish I had a career?

Did I write all of this because I have no idea what I'm doing?

Did I write all of this because I just wanted to pour it onto paper?

Maybe the answer is all four.

If anything writing is a hobby,  

Can I make a career out of it?  

Only God knows.

Well I Don't Know What I Expected.

In this classic Arrested Development clip, Michael Bluth opens a bag that says Dead Dove, Do Not Eat and then opens the bag to see exactly what it was.  Thus saying "Well I don't know what I expected".

The same could be said about my adventures in dating.  Somehow, someway I always overdo it and end up repeating a vicious cycle.  I'm just starting to accept the fact that maybe I should be happy with who I am as a person before I try to make a girl be happy she's with me.  I think I'm just burned out on failure.  My latest one was my longest, we lasted a month before my emotions got the best of me.  Damn these emotions.  I don't know how to not be overly invested in a relationship or I don't know the comfort zone of the girl I'm dating.  As my friend Phil would say I put 109% effort into every girl I date and most girls don't want that.

So until I find a girl who also puts 109% in a relationship (if she exists)  I think I'm just going to accept singledom as my best option for the remainder of 2015.  I think I'm just fed up with all the nonsense and hoops I jump through only to fall flat on my face through said hoop.  I either go too fast, too slow, or not fast enough.  There is no perfect medium to my madness.  I think I'm a likeable guy, charming, handsome to some and funny but I'm just not a fan of online dating and or hooking up. Hooking up isn't satisfying, dating can be frustrating and true love is the ultimate goal.

Maybe it's just because I feel like I'm getting older by the day but 24 just seems like a larger number than it should be.  I'm not saying I need to settle down and find the one but I would like to find someone on God's green Earth that wants to be with a guy like me.  I think I still have time to find her but at the same time..I just feel like the sand is seeping through the hour glass.

In closing, I think 2015 will still be a good year for me, it's unfortunate that things did not work out between this girl and I but I enjoyed my time with her as much as I could and those are the memories I will take away from this. It's a learning experience if anything that I need to cool it with my emotions when it comes to dating because they seem to scare women away and I just need to accept this.

I'm not in any mood to get back on the Tinder horse anytime soon.  Right now, I just need my friends, a tall draft beer and some Netflix binging.  That girl is out there somewhere or maybe I've already met her and I don't know it but I know that it's going to be pretty awesome when we finally get together.